Time is with us and yet eludes us. Lately i find myself expressing how little time i have to do everything i want. Maybe my pace doesn’t match the energy around me, or i forget to look around me, peering into the future with such blinkers, that what is with me i cannot see.
Kharchi in my childhood was also pocket money. A small amount handed every day to buy tuck at the tuck-shop at school or simply to enjoy the amla outside the school gates.
Nowdays we try and steal this kharchi every sunday. Trying to do nothing…which for me would be late breakfast, read, lunch at my favourite cafe, read, nap, read….
In between the madness of adult life, i am reminded by those around me to stop and breathe. These souls that care for me, even went to the extent of planning a surprise dinner for me, with bubbly and steak….this poem is for them…my spiritual family….. by Gulzar.
Translation By pavan k verma
Mujhe kharchi mein pura din, har roz milta hai
Magar har roz koi cheen leta hai, jhapat leta hai, anti se!
Everyday i am given a full day to spend
But every day someone grabs it away
Snatches it from me
Kabhi khise se gir padhta hai toh girne ki aahat bhi nahi hoti,
Khare din ko bhi mein khota samajh ke bhool jata hu!
Sometimes it drops out of my wallet
And i do not even hear it fall
Even a good day i forget thinking it was bad!
Gireban se pakad ke mangane wale bhi milte hai!
‘Teri guzhri hui pushto ka karza hai,
Tujhe kiste chukani hai~’
Then there are those who collar me and claim my day!
‘It is a debt owed by generations before you,
You must pay the instalments~’
Zabardast koi girvi bhi rakh leta hai, yeh keh kar,
Abhi do-char lamhe karch karne ke liye rakh le,
Bakaya umr ke khate mein likh dete hai,
Jab hoga, hisaab hoga
Others forcibly mortgage it by saying:
‘You can have a few moments to spend
The rest we will credit to your remaining life
And settle accounts when required.’
Badi hasrat hai pura ek din ek baar mein apne liye rakh lu,
Tumhare saath pura ek din bas kharch karne ki tamanna hai!
I yearn to have
A full day to myself, if only for once
And to spend that one full day with you
Is what i truly desire.